It's "going to therapy" as a generic catch-all term that bugs me. I'm a man who has "been to therapy" with a non-M.D. counselor (that I was lucky enough to have totally covered by my insurance). I had a discrete set of issues that I need some help with. She talked to me, offered some helpful tools, and then said we were done. It was definitely worthwhile, but only because I was already self-aware enough to know what I needed help with and how to ask. If I had just approached her and said, "I'd like therapy, please, because it's good to Do Therapy," I really wonder what I'd have gotten out of it. What is it that men are supposed to "go to therapy" FOR?
i am a therapist in training and i could not agree more. individual change is important, but so many problems that people bring to therapy in the first place did not start with them. america's mental health crisis is a systemic issue that needs to be addressed through systemic change.
also, i have lived in CO for almost 30 years. i've lived through and grieved too many shootings, starting with columbine when i was 8. the one that happened today was in my city. i am just so tired and sad. :(
"It once again finds a way to put the responsibility on men to fix themselves, to google it, to not ask questions but also, miraculously, find their own way to the correct ideas."
I think this point raises a lot more questions too. There's a lot of "figure it out yourself, I don't owe you anything!!" online, and of course it's very true that online strangers don't owe any other online strangers anything - but where does that put us? How do we expect people to find their way to the resources they need in a basically endless vat of online information & content? By relying on random comment responders who feel like they have the time today...? Not to Q pill the conversation either but without at least some semblance of genuine empathetic interaction, people who just self-direct themselves to the information they believe is the truth to form their worldview is clearly not the most beneficial way of addressing a lack of understanding. At the same time, it's nobody's job to respond/interact with anybody else online if they don't want to!!! Also, how does throwing a question out into the void of the internet-sphere guarantee that they'll even have the chance to interact with somebody meaningfully anyway????
Ok this comment is way longer than I thought it was but really... the internet contains all the information you could ever want to learn, so it's so easy expect people to be able to use it to find any answers they're looking for. But the way they get from point A (I have a complex question!) to point B (now I understand many points of view that are involved in addressing said complex question!) is so convoluted when "just google it" isn't a meaningful way to start.
Things really do feel hopeless. *hugs* It’s so painful, caring, empathy, compassion, understanding. I wish every human could physically feel the anguish and despair that we feel over the state of humanity.
It's "going to therapy" as a generic catch-all term that bugs me. I'm a man who has "been to therapy" with a non-M.D. counselor (that I was lucky enough to have totally covered by my insurance). I had a discrete set of issues that I need some help with. She talked to me, offered some helpful tools, and then said we were done. It was definitely worthwhile, but only because I was already self-aware enough to know what I needed help with and how to ask. If I had just approached her and said, "I'd like therapy, please, because it's good to Do Therapy," I really wonder what I'd have gotten out of it. What is it that men are supposed to "go to therapy" FOR?
i am a therapist in training and i could not agree more. individual change is important, but so many problems that people bring to therapy in the first place did not start with them. america's mental health crisis is a systemic issue that needs to be addressed through systemic change.
also, i have lived in CO for almost 30 years. i've lived through and grieved too many shootings, starting with columbine when i was 8. the one that happened today was in my city. i am just so tired and sad. :(
"It once again finds a way to put the responsibility on men to fix themselves, to google it, to not ask questions but also, miraculously, find their own way to the correct ideas."
I think this point raises a lot more questions too. There's a lot of "figure it out yourself, I don't owe you anything!!" online, and of course it's very true that online strangers don't owe any other online strangers anything - but where does that put us? How do we expect people to find their way to the resources they need in a basically endless vat of online information & content? By relying on random comment responders who feel like they have the time today...? Not to Q pill the conversation either but without at least some semblance of genuine empathetic interaction, people who just self-direct themselves to the information they believe is the truth to form their worldview is clearly not the most beneficial way of addressing a lack of understanding. At the same time, it's nobody's job to respond/interact with anybody else online if they don't want to!!! Also, how does throwing a question out into the void of the internet-sphere guarantee that they'll even have the chance to interact with somebody meaningfully anyway????
Ok this comment is way longer than I thought it was but really... the internet contains all the information you could ever want to learn, so it's so easy expect people to be able to use it to find any answers they're looking for. But the way they get from point A (I have a complex question!) to point B (now I understand many points of view that are involved in addressing said complex question!) is so convoluted when "just google it" isn't a meaningful way to start.
Also this assumes that they are turning to the internet because they aren't getting answers from sources irl, just clearing that up
Things really do feel hopeless. *hugs* It’s so painful, caring, empathy, compassion, understanding. I wish every human could physically feel the anguish and despair that we feel over the state of humanity.